3 Ways Stress Affects Your Health
It’s 3.30pm and you’re on your way home after picking up your 3-year-old daughter from nursery. You have your 4-month-old baby strapped to you in a sling. The baby is screaming because he’s hungry and probably has a dirty nappy, but you didn't have time to sort him out before leaving because his erratic nap times meant you’re late for pick up – again. Your daughter is upset because she was the last to be picked up – again. You haven’t eaten anything since finishing your daughter’s bowl of Cheerios from breakfast. You’ve had 3 cups of coffee today but you still feel barely capable of dragging your feet in front of each other. You know you should take your daughter to the park to burn off some energy from nursery but you have a mountain of clothes to wash, dry and fold, dinner to cook and hoovering to do. Just as you start making a mental list of the things you need to do when you get home, your daughter slips out of your hand and runs towards her friend…who’s on the other side of a busy road. Time slows down as you watch in horror as she heads towards a very busy road. In seconds you find a superhuman burst of energy, you rush over and scoop her up just before she reaches the kerb.
Phew! I don’t know about you but that scenario left me breathless…before I even got to the near-accident!
That was a truly stressful scenario, and apart from the almost-accident is one that is all-too-familiar for many mums, especially mums of multiple children.
Normal stress vs abnormal stress
The hormone that tends to be associated with stress is cortisol. This is released when an extra burst of energy is needed. But not all cortisol release it bad - first thing in the morning, your cortisol levels are at its highest after being low all night, to signal that it’s time to wake up, get ready and feed the children. In the scenario above, it was cortisol (and adrenaline!) that allowed you to reach your daughter before she got to the road.
Acute release of cortisol in moments of stress keep us and our loved ones out of harm’s way.
But chronic levels of stress hormones - caused by poor sleep, hunger, low levels of nutrients, a never-ending To Do list - becomes problematic, and over time these things add up. The effect?
You struggle to lose your pregnancy weight
You feel barely able to cope
You struggle to find the joy in parenting everyone has promised you
You feel drained but unable to sleep due to feel panicky and anxious at night.
Many years down the line, ongoing, unrelenting stress could lead the body to eventually give up and produce lower cortisol levels. This is when burnout and adrenal fatigue happens. Essentially, your body has just had enough and you are running on empty.
Stress, poor sleep and early motherhood
Stress can have a particularly profound effect in early motherhood. To allow labour and breastfeeding to happen smoothly, oxytocin - aka the cuddle hormone - is needed to produce contractions, stimulate breastmilk production and promote bonding with baby.
But oxytocin is acutely sensitive to stress hormones - high cortisol will lower oxytocin levels. That’s why contractions can sometimes slow down when you get to the hospital as the change in environment - from the familiar, warm, cosy home to the brightly lit, strange, cold hospital - is a stressful change for the body.
Stressful or traumatic births can cause postnatal depression and difficulty breastfeeding. Oxytocin and prolactin (another hormone that governs breastmilk production) - has a huge affect on maternal behaviour and mood, so difficulty breastfeeding and depression often go hand in hand.
In addition, tiredness and fatigue raises cortisol, which as we have seen negatively affects mood and ability to breastfeed. Fatigue also causes us to crave sugar and carbs, which leads to us to feeling more tired in the long run and mood swings. Put together, these factors increase stress levels, leading to a vicious cycle of tiredness-stress-difficult mothering-stress-anxiety-fatigue.
Not getting enough sleep increases inflammation, which diverts the immune system from repairing after birth to dealing with inflammation elsewhere. Ultimately, this causes stress, dampened immune system, anxiety and difficulty coping with everyday scenarios
Stress and gut bacteria
When we feel relaxed, happy and safe, the bacteria in our guts remain at good levels to maintain balance in the gut and a good immune response. Under stress, gut bacteria communities behave erratically and begin to struggle to stay in check. This can lead to an imbalance, which has knock-on effects on immunity, gut health, brain health and hormone health.
Here’s a quick checklist to know whether your gut health is being compromised by stress:
Infrequent bowel movements (1 or fewer a day)
Constipation or diarrhoea (or swinging between the two)
Loss of appetite or erratic hunger
Stomach cramps
Indigestion
These are the sort of symptoms that I discuss with clients during an initial consultation; they give me an insight into what’s going on deep inside that’s disrupting an overall picture of health.
Strategies to cope with stress
Considering the scenario we started with, you might think - well what’s a mum to do? Being a mum IS stressful and that’s just the way it is.
NOT TRUE. Being a mum does mean facing difficult and scary situations, but being stressed out isn’t the inevitable answer. The trick is in your body’s ability to cope. Addressing chronic stress means allowing your body to know how to cope with acute stress.
Eat. Remember to eat regularly. When you’re recovering from childbirth and breastfeeding, you need more calories to ensure your body has the energy to heal, produce milk and cope with the demands of a baby.
Eat the good stuff. Focus on good quality fat and protein, rainbow vegetables and proper hydration to ensure you are replenishing your body of the nutrients pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding is taking from it.
Breathe. Before you get up in the morning, take 10 slow, easy breaths. While waiting for the kettle to boil, take 10 slow, easy breaths. While breastfeeding, take 10 slow, easy breaths. While putting your shoes on, take 5 easy breaths per shoe. You get the gist. Find moments in your day to stop and listen to your breathing.
Ask for help. You are not a bottomless cup. Get it refilled.
Say no. Try not to take on everyone else’s shit. Don’t try and do it all. Mothering is a full-time job. You don’t need more stuff.
Laugh. Your kids are hilarious. Find the moments of fun and laugh. Proper, big belly laughs. Chances are your kids will find it funny too.
Move. For yourself, not to get from A to B but for the sheer joy of moving in the open air. Take the time to walk slowly - it helps if you have a new walker to slow you down - let them lead you rather than ushering them to the next activity.
Take time for yourself. It’s a cliche but a fair one - as mums we just don’t put ourselves first. What self-love looks like to each person is going to be different, but strategies that are particularly good for improving stress response are:
Restorative yoga (not ashtanga/power) - look for yin yoga
Meditation - 5 minutes of someone else telling you to watch your thoughts is a balm for the soul
Breath awareness - as above.
Yoga nidra - deep, present relaxation - blissful in the evening.
Being told not to stress out is stressful in itself. But chances are, you recognised aspects of yourself in that scenario at the beginning. Eventually down the line you look at yourself and realise you don’t know who you are.
Stopping the cycle now will go a very long way to ensuring you have a future where you are full of abundant energy so you can find the joyful moments that are worth living for. Why not flourish now?